Emotional intelligence in leadership is a puzzle many researchers and scholars of leadership are trying to solve. Maybe the first man in Eden also struggled with it when God created the world and asked him to "master and subdue it and have dominion over it" (Gen. 1:28) and to work and keep it' (Gen. 2:15) The responsibility of man is to be the CEO so to say, manage and develop what God has created and put in his charge; He, man is to use the resources given to him both natural and human. Man is still faced with this dilemma of mastering himself, the earth and all that is within it. Man is called to be stewards of the gifts that has been given to him. We are called to manage the gifts and talents that God has given to us and put it to good use. (Mt.25:14-30) For a community, ministry, organization, or country, parishes, religious congregations or household to run smoothly, good leaders are needed. For this reason, governmental institutions, churches and families, social organizations spend a lot of resources in the formation of the present and future leaders.
Much has been written on leadership, many theories and models which help us to better understand and develop our leadership skills. In Daniel Goleman's (Best of Harvard Business Review 1998) research article; What makes a leader? it discusses "Emotional Intelligence".
Goleman states that 'leaders need to have three skills (accounting, business planning), cognitive skills (analytical reasoning), and emotional skills (ability to work with others: self -awareness, self-regulation, motivation, empathy, and social skills). He further stated that "most effective leaders are alike in one crucial way: they all have a high degree of 'emotional intelligence'. The study found that emotional intelligence was twice as important as the other two (technical skills and IQ). He addresses the components of emotional intelligence:
Self-knowledge: This is the ability to recognize and understand one's moods, emotions and drives, as well as their effects on others. This is expressed as self-confidence, not a stand offish attitude. This self-confidence in a leader is founded and rooted in humility and driven by charity towards those in his/her charge. Leaders are filled with knowledge and wisdom. One of the great doctors of the Catholic Church, St. Teresa of Jesus of Avila, used to tell her daughters, for a spiritual guide, it is better a man of knowledge and wisdom than a pious person.
Self-discipline: This is the ability control unruly impulses and mood swings. Such individuals weigh matters before making decisions; they are not erratic or irrational in their decision making process, they are trustworthy and have integrity as their motto. They are not rigid, and are open to meaningful change.
Driven: These individuals have motivation, a passion to work for reasons that go beyond money, power or status. They have a proclivity to pursue goals with drive and persistence. They are undaunted by difficulties and have mastered the ability to rise above set backs, failure and even disasters. They are committed individual. They can be counted on.
Empathy: The ability to understand the emotional makeup of the other people. Leaders are aware and have the skills in treating and dealing with people according to their emotional reactions. It includes the ability to build and retain talent, cross-cultural sensitivity, and service to clients and customers. Leaders are all about service.
Monday, May 23, 2016
Empowering Women Myth or Reality?
The empowerment and emancipation of women is a global phenomenon. The feminist movement and activists from various backgrounds have vehemently advocated for gender equality and promote the dignity of women.
Gender equality and the empowerment of women is a work in progress. I daresay that Christ was the first to place women in their rightful place. The gospel of Luke is laden with many parables in which Christ showed respect for women. The hypocrisy of the Pharisees and Sadducees was not uncommon. Take for instance the parable of the woman caught in adultery (John 8: 1-11) The leaders were ready to stone her to death as was the custom of the day. Jesus came along saying he who is blameless of sin let him cast the first stone. In some parts of the world, women still do not have a voice, who will speak for them? Men and women are created in the image and likeness of God, not one superior to the other. When gender becomes an issue, it is usually in regards to social norms and acceptable behavior. Often there is a double standard. You need not degrade one gender to promote another. Each has its own unique role and must be respected. Male and female he created them.
Many Church documents have always defined the dignity of women and their indispensable role in the Church and the world as a whole. Pope Francis has called for more widespread and incisive female presence in the Church. He addressed the issue of finding balance between equality and difference in an address of February 9th this year in the presence of the Pontifical Council for Culture's Plenary Assembly. Men and women must come to live together acknowledging their differences and not against each other. By nature, both men and women are the same. One is necessary to the other.
The role and contribution of women particularly in pastoral activity, education, social, economic as well as political should be highly encouraged. One must keep in mind where the first man Adam failed, it took the fiat of WOMAN, Mary the Second Eve to rectify this. The feminine dimension of the Church should be welcomed, it regenerates life.
We must not bury our heads as Ostriches, and pretend that gender discrimination does not exist. There is a disparity in jobs, opportunities and salaries. The role of the woman is by the side of the man. Man is .incomplete without the woman, for she is taken from his side. Behind every successful man is a woman. Proverbs 31:10-31 describes this woman. She is priceless and far surpasses rubies. The woman is not some property to be taken for the use of the man, rather they are one. This dialogue for equality of men and women will continue for ages to come, and we must never of having such discussions.
There is one race, and that is the human race, and all are to be revered and respected.
Gender equality and the empowerment of women is a work in progress. I daresay that Christ was the first to place women in their rightful place. The gospel of Luke is laden with many parables in which Christ showed respect for women. The hypocrisy of the Pharisees and Sadducees was not uncommon. Take for instance the parable of the woman caught in adultery (John 8: 1-11) The leaders were ready to stone her to death as was the custom of the day. Jesus came along saying he who is blameless of sin let him cast the first stone. In some parts of the world, women still do not have a voice, who will speak for them? Men and women are created in the image and likeness of God, not one superior to the other. When gender becomes an issue, it is usually in regards to social norms and acceptable behavior. Often there is a double standard. You need not degrade one gender to promote another. Each has its own unique role and must be respected. Male and female he created them.
Many Church documents have always defined the dignity of women and their indispensable role in the Church and the world as a whole. Pope Francis has called for more widespread and incisive female presence in the Church. He addressed the issue of finding balance between equality and difference in an address of February 9th this year in the presence of the Pontifical Council for Culture's Plenary Assembly. Men and women must come to live together acknowledging their differences and not against each other. By nature, both men and women are the same. One is necessary to the other.
The role and contribution of women particularly in pastoral activity, education, social, economic as well as political should be highly encouraged. One must keep in mind where the first man Adam failed, it took the fiat of WOMAN, Mary the Second Eve to rectify this. The feminine dimension of the Church should be welcomed, it regenerates life.
We must not bury our heads as Ostriches, and pretend that gender discrimination does not exist. There is a disparity in jobs, opportunities and salaries. The role of the woman is by the side of the man. Man is .incomplete without the woman, for she is taken from his side. Behind every successful man is a woman. Proverbs 31:10-31 describes this woman. She is priceless and far surpasses rubies. The woman is not some property to be taken for the use of the man, rather they are one. This dialogue for equality of men and women will continue for ages to come, and we must never of having such discussions.
There is one race, and that is the human race, and all are to be revered and respected.
Going the extra mile: The call of the Gospels
"The value of a sheep is in its tail" is an African proverb ~ The tail of a sheep seems minor and can easily be dismissed as insignificant and having no value because of its location which is behind. It is customary that some even cut off part of the tail so as to enable it to grow healthier. The sheep stores much of its fat in the tail. The lesson here is that it is not enough to make maximum use of our gifts and talents, we must also look beyond what is the obvious, look for that which is hidden, that which seems to be minor and insignificant. This is what is known as doing that which is little with extraordinary attention, it is in these little details that one finds perfection, it is going the extra mile, when no one is watching.
Individuals who go the extra mile are those who are willing to go beyond the call of duty or expectations. Our Lord Jesus Christ says, "if someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the left one also... and if someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles" (Mat. 5:39-41) Some people might think what Christ is encouraging here is a certain submissiveness that does not value the freedom of the individual, rather what he is teaching is that one should not be satisfied by merely getting by, or traveling along the easy path with the least resistance. Don't be satisfied with the basics; we have the capacity to achieve more than we can imagine. If we do not just look at things on the surface, if we can go deeper we will rise to such heights of perfection in our way of life and thinking. Scriptures presents a relevant scenario in the parable of the talents. Three servants were entrusted with special resource. "The man who had received the five talents went at one and put his money to work and gained five more. so also the one what the two talents gained two more" (Mat 25:16-17) To go an extra mile requires creativity and thinking outside the box, which these two servants clearly exhibited and were appropriately rewarded. The servant who buried his talents also was rewarded accordingly. Our gifts and talents are not just for selfish gains, they are given to us to better humanity.
The disciples on the road to Emmaus met a lone traveler and tried to protect him from danger. they told him about the brutal crucifixion of Jesus. They did not stop at warning him about the unsafe environment prevailing in that area but they also compelled him to stay with them and resume the journey at daybreak. "But they strongly urged him, "to stay with us for it is almost evening; the day is nearly over" (Luke 24:28-29) You can say that they have already given him enough information; yet they were not satisfied, they went the extra mile as they became too concerned for the travelers' safety and ultimately discovered that it was the Lord. In going the extra mile, one discovers Christ, do all things for the glory of God, and whatever you do to and for the least of my brethren that you do unto me (Matt. 25: 40)
In the parable of the Good Samaritan, the sympathetic traveler would have done one or two things for the wounded man. "He bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine... he put the man on his won donkey, brought him to an inn and took care of him... he took out two silver coins and gave them to the innkeeper. "Look after him," he said'and when I return I will reimburse your for any extra expense you may have" (Luke 10:34-35) The good Samaritan did not think he had done enough until the man was completely cured, unlike the priest and the Levite who had gone before him and seemed to have legitimate reasons for not stopping to help a person in need.
There is also the case of the the parable of the ten lepers. Jesus healed all ten of them, however only one felt that it was not just enough to experience the joys of healing, he came back to express his gratitude. What happened to the nine? The attitude of gratitude is so key to success for it requires humility to express one's gratitude for favors received and not think that we are deserving of such favors. "one of them came back praising God in a loud voice. He threw himself at the feet of Jesus and thanked Him..." (Luke 17:15-16) We read further that our Lord asked, were there not 10? where are the other 9? Many people fail because they lack this attitude of gratitude in small things. The one who is faithful in small things will be given more and to whom much is given, much is expected.
Again, on one occasion, the disciples spent the night fishing and had caught nothing, rather than give up, the cast out into the deep and when Jesus came, he rewarded their effort and asked them to cast out there nets once more. "When they did, they were unable to haul the nets because of the big number of fish they caught" (John 21: 3-6).
The disciples did not claim that fishing time was over, rather they put in more effort. In every situation whether professional, personal, or social, there is always room to go the extra mile. Don't settle for mediocre and just get by. Martin Luther King Jr. says, "if a man is called to be a street sweeper, he should sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will pause to say, 'Here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well." The same was said of Christ "Is not this the Carpenter's son... where then did he get this wisdom.? He did all things well. (Matt. 13:55)
True success is measured by not how much but how well we do that which is our duty and when we have done all we asked to do, we should remember we are just unworthy servants. we have only done our duty. cf Luke 17:10& ff.
Friday, October 11, 2013
Coming soon
Here is a little bit about the book:
It’s an inspirational book and a collaborative effort. I have people in all fields telling their story of finding their authentic self and how it changed their lives. The authors I am featuring help others in a variety of areas such as domestic violence, addiction, relationship struggles, self -image issues, stress, divorce, life transitions and many others. But most importantly each author has a message of hope and encouragement. The purpose is to get the message out that there is help for you when you need it. That there are others who have gone through what you are going through and they've succeeded in finding happiness and fulfillment in their life. And so can you.
It’s an inspirational book and a collaborative effort. I have people in all fields telling their story of finding their authentic self and how it changed their lives. The authors I am featuring help others in a variety of areas such as domestic violence, addiction, relationship struggles, self -image issues, stress, divorce, life transitions and many others. But most importantly each author has a message of hope and encouragement. The purpose is to get the message out that there is help for you when you need it. That there are others who have gone through what you are going through and they've succeeded in finding happiness and fulfillment in their life. And so can you.
Blessing
Monica
Thursday, February 14, 2013
The faces of sin manifests its self in varied ways. Some may rationalize that sin does not exist but rather social anomalies or various forms of dysfunction assails human kind. Whatever we call them, we cannot deny the existence of evil.
The world is in constant motion a stage wherein all play a part or role, made up of the good, the bad and the ugly, religious and non religious, believer and non believer, ALL are on the journey. Every single individual is a contributor whether for good or for evil.
Let us seek that which unite, let us look for what is good in others, this is one of the keys to happiness, to allow oneself be carried by divine love.
The world is in constant motion a stage wherein all play a part or role, made up of the good, the bad and the ugly, religious and non religious, believer and non believer, ALL are on the journey. Every single individual is a contributor whether for good or for evil.
Let us seek that which unite, let us look for what is good in others, this is one of the keys to happiness, to allow oneself be carried by divine love.
Monday, February 11, 2013
When Life deals a Lemon..., When bad happens to good people
So many times we experience suffering, so many time we are "undeserving" of the misfortunes that assail us.
Why does bad things happen to good people, why do the wicked prosper? Why?
There is divine mystery in such suffering, suffering can either break us or make us. When life's trials assail us here are my 3 Ps:
Pause
Pray
Proceed
When you have put all these into effect then you proceed in the following manner:
Prayerfully
Peacfully and
Paced.
You will experiene peace of soul. There are no cookie cut answers on how to deal with life's trials, difficulties or hicups, I can however asure you that it makes you stronger like a tree planted by running streams, it bears fruit and is more sturdy than a potted plant. Stay the course, stay focused and keep your goals in mind.
It is unhealthy to dwell too much on the negative things that befall us, they tend to be depressing and can ultimately derail us.
On a practical level, seek counsel from the wise, the experienced and the compassionate. Don't go it alone. No man is an island.
Why does bad things happen to good people, why do the wicked prosper? Why?
There is divine mystery in such suffering, suffering can either break us or make us. When life's trials assail us here are my 3 Ps:
Pause
Pray
Proceed
When you have put all these into effect then you proceed in the following manner:
Prayerfully
Peacfully and
Paced.
You will experiene peace of soul. There are no cookie cut answers on how to deal with life's trials, difficulties or hicups, I can however asure you that it makes you stronger like a tree planted by running streams, it bears fruit and is more sturdy than a potted plant. Stay the course, stay focused and keep your goals in mind.
It is unhealthy to dwell too much on the negative things that befall us, they tend to be depressing and can ultimately derail us.
On a practical level, seek counsel from the wise, the experienced and the compassionate. Don't go it alone. No man is an island.
Sunday, February 10, 2013
Why do bad things happen to good people? Is it because 'good' people are more fatalistic by nature? | LinkedIn
Why do bad things happen to good peop le? Is it because 'good' people are more fatalistic by nature? | LinkedIn
Both in life and death we belong to God. Whether good or bad we belong to God. A focus on this puts things in perspective. There are no good people or bad people. There are people all created by a Creator in His image and likeness who are essentially created good. We can choose to do good or evil, whatever good we do affects others and whatever evil we do affects others, good or evil acts produces consequences.
Both good and bad people have a fair share of bad things happen to them. How these people handle such experiences is what really matters. On the one hand it can lead to transformation of self or destruction.
We can make a difference in our own little world. No, good people are not fatalistic by nature, they are good, they are icons of hope for the world that inspite of everything good exists.
Both in life and death we belong to God. Whether good or bad we belong to God. A focus on this puts things in perspective. There are no good people or bad people. There are people all created by a Creator in His image and likeness who are essentially created good. We can choose to do good or evil, whatever good we do affects others and whatever evil we do affects others, good or evil acts produces consequences.
Both good and bad people have a fair share of bad things happen to them. How these people handle such experiences is what really matters. On the one hand it can lead to transformation of self or destruction.
We can make a difference in our own little world. No, good people are not fatalistic by nature, they are good, they are icons of hope for the world that inspite of everything good exists.
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